Saturday, February 27, 2010

A few days later...

My sister asked me yesterday if I was going to continue to write on my blog and my answer was, "I don't know!" To be honest, I really wasn't planning to unless there is news that I really want to share such as, results of a PET scan! So, other than that - I probably won't be blogging much anymore!

Just to update everyone on how I am feeling, the answer is okay. I have been so exhausted the past few days and have literally spent majority of the days sleeping. I think my body has finally said, "ENOUGH CHEMO, NO MORE!"

I am very excited to get my body back to normal though and start pushing myself harder and harder each week to get my strength back. I will be eating a diet full of high antioxidant foods as well!

I turn 25 in less than a week and am excited to start a new year with a new perspective on life and health!!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Finish chemo - CHECK!

Don't be concerned that my timer on my blog isn't working because it reflects 00:00:00:00:00:00, okay not that many zero's, but you get the point! :) I am done with chemotherapy...officially! I swear the last bag of medication could not drip fast enough today!! I am definitely exhausted, but what's new! I have a bit of a different attitude this time because I don't have to return to get treatment in 15 days! Woo!!

Naturally, I feel a bit worried that the cancer will return the moment it's not fed it's toxic breakfast, but I just have to try my absolute hardest to stay optimistic and get back to my normal life. Normal life plus some new and improved modifications!

I will see the doctor again on March 11th probably for some blood work and a check-up, then after that I will get scanned, either the last week of March or first week of April. No scan date has officially been set at this time.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to EACH and EVERY single one of you that have read my blog. I thank you for all your support and thank you for bringing a smile to my face on a daily basis with all of your kind gestures. They will NEVER be forgotten. And for those of you strangers or people I may not know too well - I thank you too. I hope that I have been able to help someone fight through their cancer battle or possibly inspire someone in their everyday life. I started my blog because other cancer survivors inspired me to do so and I want to give that same gift back to someone in need.

Yes, the hard part is over (chemotherapy) but cancer will forever be apart of my life and who I am. I have never been tested so hard in my life - on a mental and physical aspect. I have had much time on my hands to think about my life and re-evaluate things...and most importantly, I have really thought about the person I want to become. I have sent in requests to volunteer with the Lymphoma & Leukemia Society, as well as plan to organize many events to help young people become more aware with cancer. I think it is very important to simply be...aware.

Please never stop praying for me and the other people fighting this battle. I am forever grateful of your prayers.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The time has come!

Tomorrow is the big day, February 24th! It's so funny because I have prepped for this day as if it were my wedding day, but sadly, it's not nearly as fun as planning for that day will be - one day... :) My sister was in town this past weekend and she said to me, "We're going to grow old together" and I looked at her and told her my new goal was to make it to age 30, let alone grow to 90. Before the big cancer bus hit me, I used to plan my life all the time - I had an age where I wanted to be married by, have children by, etc. etc. Post-cancer bus hitting me, I just want to take advantage of living each day and no longer put so much pressure on myself. Sure, I will still set goals for myself and set times to accomplish them, but goals I can control. Goals I can't control will solely be put in God's hands and I will have to wait until He feels as if it's time for me to accomplish them.

I sort of cried this morning on my way to work because I was listening to a song by John Mayer called "War of my Life." I'll end this by sharing the lyrics that really touched me.

"I'm in the war of my life, at the door of my life
Out of time and there's nowhere to run
I'm in the war of my life, at the core of my life
Got no choice but to fight til' it's done

No more suffering, no more pain
Never again"